fandom dissection

my personal fandom history, habits, etc... inspired by yatagarasu, who in turn credits planetary influence (18+).

overview

my activites online have revolved almost entirely around fandom for more than half my life. my earliest encounter with any kind of fannish space was FFN sometime in the early 2010s, which I used to read PJO and vocaloid fanfic, and later tumblr, which probably gave me permanent brain damage. that being said, it's difficult to put into words how much of a positive impact fandom culture has had on me in the long run--it has challenged me creatively, encouraged me to read more thoughtfully, and allowed me to form friendships that I still maintain to this day. I can't claim to be an expert on fandom or anything (I mean I wasn't even alive in the 90s...) but I truly love it and I am fascinated by the ways it continues to evolve.

habits

after that intro, I wish I could say I had a huge portfolio of my own fanworks to show off, but I really don't. Lmao. I deleted all my old fanfic from when I was like 12 off the face of the earth a long time ago, and I still write a lot in my free time but tend to have trouble finishing things. I don't do much fanart because I'd rather just draw 40 pictures of my own OC. so I'm mostly a passive observer, but I try not to be too much of a lurker. at some point I decided to start commenting on AO3 more and I think I've gotten pretty good about it. I love getting replies back from authors and I save all the notification emails in their own folder. I like to think of it like we're exchanging letters.

I generally prefer to approach fiction from the perspective of an outsider; I am completely fine with self-inserts and selfshippers but have no desire to participate. what I really like to do is be on the sidelines with my opera glasses so I can watch my favorite characters suffer horribly and applaud. I love whump, hurt with no comfort, and depressing/unsatisfying/bittersweet endings. I just get a kick out of stories that make me feel like I've been punched in the teeth ^_^

shipping and such

my attitude towards romance, in fiction and real life, is pretty laissez-faire. I am an unrepentant multishipper and do not particularly care about fixed positions. gender is rarely, if ever, of any concern to me; the only line I draw in this respect is that I don't really care for genderbends (they don't upset me or anything, I just don't usually have interest in them). I will give just about any pairing a chance if I can come up with a scenario where I would find it entertaining, though of course all this isn't to say that I don't have any ships I actively dislike. I also use the word "ship" quite loosely, and often have no real desire for the characters in question to be in a committed long-term relationship. sometimes I want my ships to spend their lives together and sometimes I want my ships to saw each other's limbs off.

I don't usually search specifically by trope, but I tend to like rivals-to-lovers, emotionally fraught selfcest, robot/dragon/angel/vampire/etc x human, "villain terrorizing a guy who is deeply exhausted" (I have no better way to word this. taking suggestions), canon friend groups as messy ambiguous polyships...

some arbitrary categories I made up for ships I am fond of:

• freak on freak violence (ex. akechi/akiren, suzaku/lelouch, takumi/eito)
• you have autonomy it came free with your fucking xbox (ex. utena/anthy, minato/ryoji, shulk/alvis)
• i fear only one person has truly ever understood me and i fucking hate the guy (ex. grima/robin, siffrin/loop, sphenecest)

as a bonus, some of my favorite platonic headcanons:

• akari & volo (teenage messiah and her resentful transgender uncle)
• ann & akira (bi4bi exes on good terms)
• minato & kotone (siblings grieving each other in their respective canons who cope in exact opposite directions)
• rella & louis (estranged frenemies who realized they had fundamentally different worldviews in the most disastrous way possible and never spoke again)
• sylvain & bernadetta (warrior's bond between an undercover BNF and her loyal beta reader)

hall of fame

resources

• Fanlore Extensive wiki for all things fandom. If there's a term you don't know or even just a ship you're interested in the history of, I highly recommend looking it up here first.
• fujoshi.info An educational site about yaoi, with sources. This sounds like a joke but it's really not.
• How to make a doujinshi by saba sabaton. I have linked to their bsky post that links to the guide because the guide itself is a 40+ page document that takes a minute to load.
• Can You Sell Doujinshi in Artist Alley? 20min video by the same creator, talking about their experience selling self-published fancomics in an environment that is very much not hospitable to them (yet).
• Mailing list to stay in the loop about NA doujin events
• Arrow's Guide to Running Fandom Events
• Ellipsus Google docs alternative that doesn't suck. Has an option built in to export to AO3.
• Fans Fans Fans Resources for fanlistings. Their button generator is a lifesaver.